


Cover Up

by anoonzee



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), crackfic, dyeing for your art, force skype, with hint of second ship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 13:27:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13459215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anoonzee/pseuds/anoonzee
Summary: The Force Bond shows Rey one of Kylo's best-guarded (or so he thinks) secrets. (Crack!)





	Cover Up

**Author's Note:**

  * For [daxcat79](https://archiveofourown.org/users/daxcat79/gifts).



Rey was in her room, frowning at the remains of the legendary Skywalker saber. Well, she wasn't exactly alone; she was with one of the porgs that Chewie adopted from Ach-To, who was tapping the top of the saber with a webbed foot. She shakes her head and picks up the curious creature when she tensed up.

It's happening again.

She was on her feet in a flash, the porg in her hands squawking in surprise as she whirled around to face the other person sharing this strange bond. "Can we not do...this? Uh..."

**"Don't look at me!!!"**

Rey nearly dropped the porg in response to the shout, which she knew no one else but her could hear. She stared at the hunched figure in front of her: the large man was only wearing black, high-waisted pants and a pair of fluffy black slippers. His wide shoulders were covered in an odd, shiny material that Rey guessed to be a tarp, though it barely covered his chest. And covering his hair and eyebrows was...

"Is that gray mud on your head?" she asked him, completely forgetting that she was supposed to maintain radio silence when it comes to Kylo Ren. She didn't miss him hiding something behind his back.

"None of your business!" Kylo snapped at her. The expression on his face was a fascinating mixture of horror and rage as he reached around for something with his free hand. The gray stuff completely saturated his hair; on the sides of his head were a couple of large black things that reminded Rey of cups, possibly protecting his large ears from the strange mixture. Rey also noticed that he was wearing a white glove smeared with the gray stuff. She also noticed a strong smell coming off him, like that can of paint Poe procured to disguise one of the speeders they salvaged on the new base. "What's that in your hand?" he asked gruffly.

The young woman looked down at the feathery critter in her hands, which was making an odd purring sound. "It's a porg," she said, lifting a finger to scratch its head. The porg started purring even louder, closing its giant eyes in content. Rey looked up at Kylo and stifled a laugh; he put a black towel on his head. It hid his head from view, but not enough to cover his eyebrows. "You look silly!"

Kylo snorted.

"Rude," he muttered. "I thought you didn't want to talk to me. Go away and...and don't talk to me!"

Rey blinked and Kylo was gone.

"Hmmm..."

"Prrrrt?" went the porg, curiously looking up at Rey.

\--

At the mess hall, Rey sat next to Poe Dameron and asked him a question. When she finished, the curly-haired pilot stared at her like he couldn't believe his ears.

"Sounds like your friend is dyeing his hair," Poe snickered. He furtively looked around and grinned at Rey, "I can't believe it! _Finn_ dyes his hair?!"

Rey nearly choked on a mouthful of mash. "It's not Finn!" she spluttered. "And I'm not telling!" After a violent bout of coughing, Rey continued, "So, why do people dye their hair?"

Poe shrugged. "Could be anything; they want a new look, they want to cover up gray hairs...oooh, you should have seen Admiral Holdo! Connix told me that her purple hair wasn't natural at all!"

"Why, is it a crime to dye your hair?" asked a soft, gravelly voice. Rey and Poe stood up as General Leia Organa joined them. The grand lady waved at them to sit down as she carefully took a seat as well. "Amilyn Holdo did love making a statement," she said fondly. "When I first met her at the Apprentice Legislature, her hair was electric blue. It was hard to ignore her after that."

"Wish I could have seen that," Poe murmured, looking off into the distance. Rey and Leia gave each other knowing looks before picking up another topic to discuss.

\--

Two days later, the bond connected them again. Rey was inside the Millenium Falcon fixing some circuitry in the cockpit when she felt it.

"How often do you dye your hair?" she asked airily.

She heard him sigh.

"You talked to her, didn't you?" he asked grumpily, deciding not to dignify her with an answer. There was no need to clarify who he meant.

Rey grinned briefly before closing the panel over the circuits and turning around to look at Kylo. He stood at the doorway to the cockpit, his shoulder-length locks and eyebrows as black as ever. She wasn't sure if he could see where she was; up to now, she still couldn't see where he's standing. "Not exactly; there were a few holos around the Falcon of you as a kid. You had Han's hair!"

There was a brief moment of softness that graced his face before he recalled himself and scoffed. "So what?"

Rey shrugged and sat down on one of the pilots' seats. "I'm just curious," she said lightly. "Is this part of your 'let the past die' schtick when you joined the First Order? Makes me wonder how fastidious you are in your hair care."

Before Kylo could respond, the large man stiffened and turned his back to her.

"Oh, now _YOU'RE_ ignoring me..." she began.

"Look here, _Grand Marshall_ ," Kylo said in a tight voice, sneering at the mention of the title. "It is not for you to question why I ordered this much dye...hey, don't get snippy with me. Appearances are everything...hey, I don't question you when you ordered a crate of Corellian Hair Pomade. Yeah, I know it was for you Hux...no, I never bought the excuse that you and Captain Phasma were sharing it. She wears a helmet 24/7; why would she need the other three gallons of hair pomade?!"

Rey leaned back and bit her hand, trying to stifle the hysterical laughter that threatened to bubble out of her. A squeak she wasn't able to control came out, making Kylo turn to look at her.

"It's...it's nothing Hux. Look, can we discuss this outside? Well, it's either that or I Force choke you again, how's that?"

When Chewie came on board the Falcon with five of his little porg friends, it was to find Rey holding her stomach and laughing like a woman possessed.

**Author's Note:**

> The Amilyn Holdo Wookipedia page was updated to include more information on her. The electric blue hair was my idea. I mean, she would, wouldn't she?
> 
> The inspiration for this crackfic came from this [Twitter query, which Pablo Hidalgo answered](https://anoonzee.tumblr.com/post/170020170960/daxcat79-reylo11-oh-pablo-how-dare-hux).
> 
> Honestly, Kylo Ren would be more about keeping his hair glossy. He's got special conditioner...from Corellia.
> 
> Here's to hoping this will end my writer's block.


End file.
